tomato experiment results

Q: Will tomatoes wrapped in newspaper and stored indoors ripen?
A: Yes, maybe 25% of the tomatoes will ripen, the rest will decay.

Q: Would diligently checking the tomatoes every other day have staved off decay in some?
A: I don't know.

Q: Did the light frost before the tomatoes were picked affect their quality and or create a tendency to rot?
A: Uhhh... maybe.

Q: When the subject of autumn and tomatoes and tomato harvest comes up with with people aged 65 (or so), will they suggest that you try wrapping the tomatoes in newspaper and storing them until they ripen?
A: Yes, 100% of the time (sample size: 2)

Q: Will the wrapping in newspaper technique yield tomatoes into December, as per the anecdotal evidence found in blogs?
A: Not according the the anecdotal evidence found under my bed.

the end is near ...

so I'm trying the wrap-in-newspaper-layer-in-a-box method for turning my green tomatoes red. It seems a waste to discard so much potential. Bob Flowerdew suggests green tomato chutney, but I am a little too red-blooded-american (ignorant, provincial, unsophisticated) to know what to do with chutney or be sure I'd appreciate it once the effort went into making it. So.... wrapping green tomatoes in newspaper and sticking them in a box that fits conveniently under my bed is what I plan to do with my green tomatoes. Will it work? Will I forget them and wake up one day to find my husband and I are sleeping over a mass of putridity? Time will tell.
Regarding Bob Flowerdew:
1. neither of my girls will put their hair in a braid, put on coveralls and go as Bob Flowerdew for Halloween.
2. I just mulched my young apple tree, only to read that Bob Flowerdew recommends grass under apple trees because the competition with the grass for moisture and nutrients makes the apples better keepers and the grass cushions windfalls, making the fallen apples more salvageable. Now I know. I am going to pretend like young apple trees need mulch and then by the time my tree is a well-grown, solid producer the mulch will have decomposed and the grass can have it's way with the ground.